I always feel like I should start off the New Year trying to make some profound change in my life. I guess on some level I am a victim of movies and other fiction. At midnight something magical is supposed to happen and life will be changed for the better. The reality? I was standing behind the bar last night slinging drinks with my cousin, thinking "God, it's midnight, these people need to finish up and go home." The world didn't change, my life didn't suddenly get better and none of my problems magically went away.
What do I want to acomplish in 2014? Pretty much the same thing I want to accomplish every year. What can I say? My life is a work in progress.
1. Reduce debt - My finances are a mess. I owe a scary amount of money and the numbers just don't seem to get any smaller. My debt actually went up by 17% since December 2012, but admittedly I did acquire a new-to-me vehicle in that time. I'm still panicked and stressed by the numbers, but I have a plan in place. And I'm moving at the end of this month in an attempt to lower my monthly expenses. We'll see how that goes.
2. Get healthy - I've been a large girl forever. I want to be a small(er) girl. It's a battle and I had a very rough year emotionally. I went off the rails last March and never really got back on. I've rejoined Weight Watchers (although not been actively following the plan over the holidays), but will once I get back to a routine. I also want to renew my gym membership. I don't think I'm ready for classes yet - kickboxing is intimidating when you don't know if you can make it through the class without keeling over and gasping for air in the foetal position.
3. Socialize more - This one is always a challenge. I am not an outgoing person. I like having people around, as long as I like them and they respect my space. Right now, I have two roommates who are exactly the same so it's working out well. Except that I get home from work and spend the evening hiding in my room playing World of Warcraft. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but it's not exactly a booming social life. I want to socialize more. Well, really that means date. My last date was about a year and a half ago. Wow, when I write that out, it just seems sad and depressing. Unfortunately, my odds of dating in my town are slim. It is populated with (as I like to call them) rednecks and rigpigs. It can be done, but it gets a little harder when the average age of single men is 25 (I'm 36) and looking for skinny blondes with big boobs. I may or may not be successful, but I will try.
4. Relax more - I fully admit that I have a Sunday routine of going to church and then heading in to the office. I may or may not be productive, but I like the quite and solitude of being in the building when no one else is around. I think it comes from years of working nights in a call centre. With too many people are around, I get less productive. I also have a tendency to feel restless when I'm at home with nothing concrete to do. That may be a carryover from entirely too many years of university. I have a tendency to feel like there's something I should be doing (even when I'm home for Christmas vacation, but that's a rant for another day). I want to have a life. Or at least a reasonable facsimile.
5. Finish projects - I have a half-finished scarf from over a year ago. I have a half-finished outline for a writing piece for a while ago. I have a half-finished scrapbook from a trip I took back in 2004. Get where I'm going with this? I want to clear the on-going projects that I plan on getting around to someday. This, of course, may contribute to the feeling of having something I should be doing.
6. Declutter - I am a packrat. Both of my parents and my sister are packrats. Although I come by this honestly, I hate being this way. I need to pare down my belongings - especially my books and that hurts me to admit. I just have so much crap and I can't even say that I'm keeping it for sentimental reasons, because I don't even know what I have anymore and I'm not enjoying what I do have. And since I'm moving from a fairly sizeable bedroom to a one that is 9'x9', this may be the kick in the ass I need to start cleaning house.
7. Blog more - Whether or not anyone ever reads what I write, I feel better writing it down. In 2011, I posted on my Livejournal account every day. It was usually the most random stuff that was of no interest to anyone but me, but I posted. In 2012, I posted on it six times. I didn't post there at all in 2013. I posted here four times in 2012 and none at all in 2013. I think this needs to change. Along the same vein, I think I'd like to get back into journaling more. I got to the point where I wrote about a bad time in my paper journal and haven't been able to pick it up again. That needs to change as well.
There's a lot more that I want to do, but if I make my list too long or nitpicky, then it becomes the world's biggest to-do list instead of the incentive to change that it's meant to be.
We'll see how I manage with these.
